Mom to Mom
The book of Philippians is full of gratitude, encouragement, hope, and inspiration. It can be easy to overlook the quick mention of Euodia and Syntyche. Euodia and Syntyche are two ladies in the church at Philippi who are having a dispute. They are bickering and at odds. I assume there were many disputes that occurred among the people of Philippi as they were trying to grow their church in Paul’s absence, so why was this dispute important enough to be brought to Paul in prison? And why was it significant enough to make it into the bible? I believe the mention of this disagreement gives us, as mothers, guidance and direction on our mom relationships.
Motherhood can be one of the loneliest jobs on earth. For me, the following statements are all true:
- motherhood is a job I wanted more than anything in the world
- motherhood is a job that I was grossly underqualified to perform
- motherhood is a job that triggered a remarkable degree of insecurity I had never felt before
- motherhood is a job that provides no formal measure of success or failure the entire time I have been performing it
The truth in these statements is the perfect recipe for a mother to be unable to provide support and encouragement to other moms… ironically, at a time in our lives when we need support and encouragement the most. Motherhood is a season in our lives where we can be in conflict with other women more often due to disagreements on parenting choices, the actions of our children, opinions of spouses, and the list goes on. Not unlike the feud between Euodia and Syntyche, motherhood is a time when conflicts between women can arise.
Philippian 4:2-3 has profound words of guidance regarding the conflict between these two ladies. It reads:
I implore Euodia and I implore Syntyche to be of the same mind in the Lord. And I urge you also, true companion, to help these women who labored with me in the gospel, with Clement also, and the rest of my fellow workers, whose names are in the Book of Life.
Paul cares so much about these ladies and the growth of the church that he is desperately begging them to sync up their thoughts. He is imploring them to find their similarities in Christ and not focus on their differences defined by this world. He is urging others in their group to help these women. And he has identified them as followers of Christ whose names are written in the Book of Life.
We are the believers, the followers of Christ, whose names have been written in the Book of Life. We are called to focus on our common ground in Christ instead of our differences. And, we are called to intervene when we see friends at odds.
Motherhood brings out the protector in us. Sometimes protector can translate to debater, the righter of wrongs, and the speaker of all opinions. Let’s together, as a group of moms, choose to use our protective nature to take care of our fellow moms. Let’s choose to respect them even when their opinions are different from our own. Let’s extend grace when their children have unexpected behaviors. And let’s forgo our judgment of their marriages or spousal relationships. This may not feel instinctual, but it most definitely embodies the truth of the word of God and it is an opportunity for us to live out His calling on our lives. Today, let’s:
Be the reason that motherhood is no longer lonely.
Make sure we are not the Euodia or Syntyche in someone else’s story.
Choose to focus on being of the same mind in the Lord with our fellow moms.
Today my prayer is that you see the similarities and not the differences among the women in your mom groups. I pray that whenever given the chance you will diffuse any conflict between others by speaking the truth of the word and helping them find their like-mindedness in Christ. I pray that we will collectively irradicate loneliness among moms by simply refusing to focus on our worldly differences. It is in His Holy Name and His true words that I lift up this prayer.