Bold, Powerful Gentleness


“Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near.” Philippians‬ ‭4:5‬ ‭NIV‬‬

What do you think of when you hear the word gentleness? For me, some of the words that come to mind include kind, tender, and calm. Then how can gentleness be bold and powerful? 

Galatians 5:22-23 identities gentleness as a fruit of the spirit. The fruits of the spirit are powerful God-given gifts intended to help us be fruit-bearers for His glory. Therefore, gentleness is powerful. Our gentleness should be evident to all, it should be bold, intentional, and noticeable. 

Some of us Type A mommas might think gentleness is not in our nature. Or those of us Type B moms might justify weakness as gentleness. None of us are too strong or too weak to be gentle. But as parents, how do we show gentleness when:

A child on the playground is bullying our child

A teacher is showing preferential treatment to students in our child’s class 

Our children are bickering with each other for what feels like the 900th time today

Our husband comes home from a hard day at work and is less than patient with us and the children 

A complete stranger shares her opinion on our parenting skills

Our young child has taken to throwing temper tantrums when things don’t go his way

Whether these situations trigger our internal “it’s go time” or they trigger us into a state of passive shut down, Philippians 4:5 reminds us gentleness is a better option by encouraging us to let our gentleness be evident to all.

Several years ago, I saw a sign outside a church that simply read “You can’t hide your influence.” It really grabbed me when I realized I’m influencing people whether or not I’m trying. We influence others all the time by our acts of outrage, our bold gentleness, and our uninvolvement. We get to choose how we influence, so why not choose to influence with our gentleness? 

Especially in today’s world, our children need to witness more acts of bold gentleness. Our choices and actions are continuously molding the children we are raising. In our own homes, we can start by making sure our children witness us:

  • choosing to “pray first”

  • showing gratitude in the difficult times

  • extending grace to people who don’t agree with us

  • being patient with people who have wronged us

  • responding with gentleness to those who are not being gentle to us

  • being kind to people who are unable to be kind to us

Our children reap the benefits of ongoing family conversations about what it is like to choose bold gentleness instead of impulsive aggression or crippling weakness. And how God is the only reason we can be boldly gentle in difficult situations. And how Jesus, time and time again, was boldly gentle with all of the brokenness he encountered here on earth. And finally, we need to reassure our children that the same spirit living in Jesus lives in them, allowing bold gentleness to always be a possibility.

Being gentle with others begins with being gentle with ourselves. As moms, if we practice gentleness with ourselves, it is so much easier to be gentle with others. So today, be intentional about extending grace, patience, and kindness to yourself, and then take notice of how much easier it is to do the same for others.

I pray that as moms we can boldly and intentionally model gentleness for our children. I pray that our children witness so many acts of gentleness that it permeates their spirits and becomes as natural as breathing to them. I pray that our world prioritizes, celebrates, and values gentleness as a fruit of the spirit and as a way of life. Lord, you see us and you know what we need. We trust you, we believe you, and we love you. I lift this up in your Son's precious Holy Name.



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Heidi Tringali